The Tidal waves of soul searching.

My wounds are healing, my scars are less sore,

I feel like myself every day more and more.

The thrashing waves, and once violent sky,

are calm and peaceful as boats sail on by.

Yet in the blink of an eye the calm sea becomes rough,

The sails are less sturdy, the anchor less tough.

The storm returns with a vengeance; its wrath,

destroying all that lies in its path.

She prays and holds onto her body tight,

she protects it with courage and all of her might.

She reminds herself that she commands her own ship,

she takes back control, she tightens her grip.

The sun through the clouds slowly comes into sight,

The eagle soars as he reaches flight.

 

 

 

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Who Am I? The Painful Journey Of Self Love and Acceptance

What is self love? It’s a feeling I lack,

After years of war and facing attack.

This feeling i’m immune to, its foreign and wrong,

This is a feeling for someone brave and strong.

To love oneself should be an unspoken rule,

Yet I have to teach myself how like a child at school.

I tell myself: I’m not perfect I am me and that’s ok,

I’m where I need to be, i’m going my own way.

No one else’s path matters, focus on your own direction,

looking at what others are doing wont bring me affection,

wont make love return; a resurrection.

 

One mind, one body, one spirit, one soul,

With love and acceptance as a guide, a goal.

But a dichotomy lies, a war of the mind,

One born out of hate, the other one kind.

Who wins the battle, who will reign?

Just an innocent by stander in this gnarly game.

Where do you turn, which route do you go?

When one voice cries sabotage yet the other screams no.

Will you wither and die or will you flourish and grow?

This answer is something you really don’t know.

All the while reaching out as this standoff commences,

a battle of two minds deep in the trenches.

Is there a way out will you make the right choice?

In the midst of the chaos can you find your own voice?

The one of love, of guidance not fear,

The one that reminds you softly ‘I am here’.

 

 

 

Love Is A Battle Field…

img_1840He pulls away you latch on more,
The unknown is painful your past wounds are sore.

Not knowing if you’re worthy or enough,
The sea is rocky the storm is tough.

In no mans land without a map,

Do you keep trudging forward or do you head back?

This intensity you feel deep down inside,
do you sit with it,embrace it or run for cover and hide?

Those deep brown eyes that see into my soul,
That warm embrace that makes me feel whole,

Am I holding onto a rose that can’t be revived?
Do I power through this storm hoping it will subside?

Is what he feels for me the same as what I feel for him?
Standing on the edge but too nervous to swim.
Hostile freezing waters what lies within?

Is it time to cut the anchor, to break away from the chain?
That is strangling and shackling, my strength I need to regain.

My inner power is screaming, desperate for release,
The sea ready to swallow me, ready for my decease.

Do I sink or swim, do I fight or fly?
Will my power save me or will my fear let me die?

But the moment I hear his voice that strength becomes weak,
In that second he opens his mouth to speak.

He holds my hands, looks into my heart, all my intentions, my promises break apart.

Navigating no mans land I continue to roam, trying to find my map to lead me home.

Brief Encounters….

He came into my life like a shining light,

Illuminating the sky in the depths of night.

An angel so pure he flew into my sight,

Lit up the universe, with an energy bright.

A beautiful star that healed my core,

He soothed my wounds like no other before.

A gentle aura, the softest soul,

My broken heart was immediately whole.

His touch electrifying, fireworks when we kissed,

Gone yet never forgotten, but will always be missed.

His eyes the ocean, where I could swim and dive,

His skin the softest sand, making my body alive.

The perfect puzzle, our pieces fit together,

But perhaps nothing pure can last forever.

An enchanted forest, a mystical path,

Our adventure together, I’ll never look back.

A lonesome traveller, his time had arrived,

To take to his trail and leave my side.

An eagle he prepared to spread his wings,

To see whatever his future brings.

I stare at the sea wondering where he is now,

Or if our time together could have been different somehow,

They say its darkest before the dawn,

A dark thundery sky before a clear blue morn.

I think of him fondly, hope our paths cross one day,

And that cemented in my tapestry forever he’ll stay.

How to find balance 

Whether it is to get fitter, healthier, spend less money, be kinder to others- we all want to make changes here and there. However there is a fine line between practicing self-care, and pushing yourself too hard in the gym, restricting your diet, or working too many hours at the office. It is easy to tip the balance too far. Lets make 2016 the year of positivity, self-love and releasing our true potential. So how do we go about doing so? Read on for the lowdown…
Moderation is the key to achieving balance in all aspects of life. Too much of anything can become unhealthy, which is why it is important to be mindful of our actions, and whether or not the outcome will be positive.

We have all heard the saying ‘do to others as you would have them do to you’ well this is absolutely true. Treat yourself as you would treat a friend. In the same way that you would show loved ones compassion and understanding, you must act the same way towards yourself. If you make a mistake at work, eat one too many cookies, or act in a way that you are not happy about, think of what you would say to someone close to you, and how you would help them in that situation. Offer yourself the same advice. That it is ok, it is not the end of the world, and tomorrow is a new day.

Taking baby steps is important! Have patience and do not try to take huge leaps or shortcuts to achieving your goals quickly. Show yourself dedication. If something does not quite go to plan, do not beat yourself up, instead take a deep breath and try again.

Make sure you create time for yourself amidst your busy day-to-day tasks. On an evening try to switch off from work, read an interesting book, take a bubble bath, and do something positive for yourself.

Try something new- Take up a new hobby such as a cooking course, art class or try Tai Chi. Tai Chi is great for the mind, body and spirit. This calming ‘meditation in motion’ is extremely beneficial for our physical and mental wellbeing and provides a constructive way of unwinding.

Get creative- Adult mindfulness colouring books have become extremely popular in helping to de-stress and relax. With beautifully drawn art therapy designs appealing to all ages, these artistic images are fun to colour, whilst simultaneously taking your mind into a state of balance and calm.

Try to be present in each moment, and focus on your own personal needs. We are all guilty of constantly checking instagram and social media pages to see what other people are doing, and it is easy to get caught up in trying to keep up with the Jones’. Yet this can be detrimental to your overall happiness. Focus on what is right for you and if you are where you need to be.

Meditation is a great way of practicing self-care. Meditation focuses on being in the moment, and noticing your thoughts as they come and go in your mind, almost like moving clouds in a constant sky. It allows room for thought and reflection, and helps you to become more aware of situations. Contrary to popular belief, it doesn’t have to be completed whilst sat on the floor crossed legged like Rafiki, nor does it have to be done for long periods of time.

Set yourself a positive challenge, and try to dedicate 5 minutes every morning when you wake up, to focus on your breathing and setting your intentions for the day. Meditation has proven to drastically improve one’s wellbeing. It isn’t always easy, but with practice and determination you will see positive results. The great thing about meditation is that you can do it anywhere, a quiet room is preferable, but if you are a busy bee, you can even meditate on the tube. There are many meditation apps that you can use to guide you, with some even offering different meditations for specific occasions.

Write a journal: Writing down your thoughts and feelings as well as tasks for each day can be a very productive way to reflect. The Happiness Planner is a brilliant diary that incorporates the practices of positive thinking, positive affirmations, mindfulness, gratitude, and self-development into the daily and weekly/monthly pages.

Most importantly of all – fall in love with yourself this year!!

Recommended reads: Mindfulness: A practical guide to finding peace in a frantic world by Mark Williams
Recommended apps: calm and headspace
Recommended classes and events:
Tai chi for beginners classes round London.